Bea's Journal

[Ege Bamyasi]

We all love you, Bea. You're trying so hard and I know those kids are going to be richly rewarded by the time they spend with you.

Your weight is coming along great, too. I'm really sorry to see you're having so much difficulty with the small scooter and the water problems. I feel almost silly yammering on about my own water retention woes, given how much more you're trying to take on than I am at present! But I am very confident that we're both going to get where we need to be eventually.

Come on in and post as time allows, and know that we're always thinking about you too. You are an incredible inspiration to more people than we may ever know of.

[Letha.]

Yesterday the PT tried to talk to me about taking disability - to be able to get the water off and be off my knees so they aren't further damaged and to have the time to exercise. I said NO WAY. He told me I cannot keep pushing through the pain because it's causing more damage. So I have so much hope that this new scooter will be the answer. I am just going to make it work.

Hi Bea,
You know, working or taking disability are not your only options. If you could arrange it financially, you may be able to take up to three months unpaid leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act. I know you don’t like the idea of being labeled as disabled, but there are many disabled people in the workforce and if you are disabled you may also be entitled to various forms of reasonable accommodation. This could include, among other things, having automatic door openers installed at the school if they are not already. As a teacher I’m assuming you also have a union representative who could give you additional resources on these topics.
Best wishes.
Letha

[Anna Green]

Letha, that's right on. Also, disability benefits can be a temporary thing. There are different programs available including one that allows you to gradually get back into work with less penalty. Go to the SS website and take a look. I am not recommending you do this because it may not be the best decision for you. Only you can decide, however it you do consider it there are a few things you need to know if you don't already. It's hard to get. They almost always deny the first time and I have known people to apply 2,3,4 times before they get it. You have a much better chance if you prepare well. This includes making sure your physicians document well. They should write specifics about the impact of your health problems on your day to day activities such as how far you can walk, how much you can lift, how long they expect this to be an issue, etc. They should talk about the impact of your continued work on your health. They need to write legibly- yes this alone can hold up the process. When I have assisted people I get the records to take a look before SS does. After you apply figure out who the person is assigned to the case. Call them every week or so and ask them if they have received all the records, if they were comprehensive, if they need additional information. Stay on your physicians office to send the records. Oh, and you don't have to be receiving benefits to be labeled disabled. Your physician can do that.

Another thing to consider is that if you don't own your own home there are nice (at least here) apartment/condos that you may qualify for even if you aren't receiving benefits. You may have them in your area as well. The rent is based on income. We have developers here that receive tax credits in exchange for providing a certain number of units for elderly and people w/ disabilities. Some are kind of luxurious. I'd fill them with homeless but they do credit/background checks and even though they will often be lenient with credit the background checks aren't usually passed by the people I serve. People are often arrested for being homeless.

Anyway I know you will make the best decision for you and either way you go it's all going to just get better as you continue taking care of yourself.

[BHealthy]

Wow! You are all the greatest! What more support could a McDougaller ask for....?

Well, I did it. I worked out at the health club pool and I even swam 1/2 mile in the workout. The interesting part was that I tried to do the laps first and my legs wouldn't work - knees wouldn't bend and it hurt. So, I did my suspended workout exercises and then swam the laps and it was smooth and they worked dandy.

Another great thing was that the steps into the pool were not so deep - I could get out on my own with my cane and the rail. It was such a relief. I've got my plan down and I know it's going to go well.

I weighed later today and was 384 so if I could just lose 5 pounds by Monday night I'd make my goal. Whether it happens or not isn't a big deal - but I do plan on taking the lasix on Monday because tomorrow I'm working in my classroom all day and it wouldn't be a good plan then.

Thanks so much to all of you!!!

I can't remember if I told you - but I absolutely adore my class this year. Such great kids and frisky ones, silent ones, curious, brave and you name it - very diverse. So many languages, too. 9 I think - or 10 counting English. I love that! I just hope I can convince the parents to come in and share about their traditions this year.

My goal is to get that scooter and use it. I really appreciate the advice about the disability act and looking into getting accomodations at the workplace. My principal is probably nervous about that kind of thing. Only our front door has the push button. The only disabled restroom - actually I don't know where there is one - there has to be. Maybe it's the kindergarten bathroom - actually I think those are the ones they have a rail in them and are wide enough for a wheelchair.

I think I already made my principal nervous by asking about using the "uncensored" version of a children's book I own regarding families. First off I know it is 100% totally legal to read this book that includes same sex parents - and I feel it is the right thing to do - but I also know I could cause some trouble doing it since we have a strong religious right community in part and a reactive one at that. So it will be interesting to see what the principal says when shown the book. The curriculum focus is on self and family - so it's appropriate. I always feel that the books are so darn unfair...especially when having students with same sex parents. It's just so darn wrong not to honor all forms of family. Anyway, I'm off my soapbox.

Well, I am having a late supper coming up due to being out and about most of the day and early evening.

I hope to find time on Monday to visit all of your journals. Until then, please know how much I appreciate your incredible kind and supportive words of encouragement and advice.

Hugs to all of you!

[Tina]

Bea, your class sounds great this year. It's wonderful to hear how much you appreciate their diversity. As a teacher I've had to defend my own book choices (about families with different religions, same sex parents, etc.) and at the end of the day it always feels so good to stand up for the inclusion of all families and the dignity of all students. Keep up the good work!

[LauraA]

Good for you, Bea! My grandkids, who have two moms, go to public school in Seattle. There are three kids with same sex parents in my grandson's class, and there are signs outside the door mentioning that the school strives to make everyone feel welcome. I can't remember the exact wording, but they want to be notified if anyone feels discriminated against. It is so wonderful!! I appreciate your efforts to assure that all families are represented in your classroom and in your world! Thank you, LauraA

[BHealthy]

My weight this morning is 379 - but yesterday it was 380 - so that's my Sept 7 - or 2nd month weight.

I've been incredibly busy and am having difficulty getting to the pool - but will get that worked out this week.

Made a big batch of veggie and kidney bean soup which has been delicious. Will take a hummus/veggie sandwich, salad and apple for lunch today as it takes too long to get to the microwave. Soup for dinner tonight.

[sksamboots]

Hope you get to the pool soon, i know you must be missing it. Keep on keeping on

[bunsofaluminum]

that pool exercise sounds lovely. Swimming is a favorite of mine, even swimming competetively as a teenager...it's amazing what a total body workout you can get, without any stress on any joints at all.

bless you. I'm having to deal with some gender identity stuff with some friends of my daughter. they go to a youth group; one of her friends is transgendered ftm and wants to be included in the guy activities, but is physically a girl...it is breaking my heart, and I only pray the pastor and others can come at this gently and with a great deal of mercy and wisdom.

blessings, heidiW

[Letha.]

Hi Bea,
I’m assuming you’ve just been crazy buzy with the new school year. Hope you’ll post an update soon. Best wishes.
Letha

[BHealthy]

I've been swamped, swamped and more swamped of course. I did manage to get water workouts in twice last week. It's got to be before work otherwise I'm too wiped out - plus am not getting home until it's late so getting up at 4:45 to go swim is the word. It will be okay once I get used to it. It feels so much better to have the exercise duty finished for the day early on like that anyway.

The PT and his boss are working to get my insurance to help pay for an electric wheelchair. They think that will be much better for me than a scooter and I agree. My little scooter is a knee killer - since it's too small for me and not built to for knee problems really. The wheelchair will enable me to have my legs in the correct position and be for my weight, as well as be able to go outside. The kicker is that insurance usually won't consider mobility vehicles unless the patient is unable to work or can't move about at home without one. I don't move about a lot at home. I have a chair in my kitchen to sit down so my knees don't hurt and canes in several rooms for getting around. It's at work where I need the wheelchair. I can't get rid of these fluids because every time I walk - they come back...anyway, please send any positive vibes you can with the wheelchair in mind. What a help that would be.

I'm able to swim 1/2 mile during my water workout now. I do 30 or so minutes of the exercise routine and end with the 1/2 mile swim and then do stretches. It takes 60 min for the workout and about 10 for the stretches. I was able to get it all in and head home to shower, eat, and get to work on time. I've got to have it all ready for action in the morning, but I can do it. So . . . hello 9ish bedtime and good morning 4:45 alarm!

My weight is in the 370s now. I'm glad to see it going down even with these darn fluids. Someday they will be gone. I couldn't take the lasix all week of course - at work and all - and then this weekend so it's going to be awhile before I can take it again.

I have a sleepover at the sleep study place on Friday night. PT after work - race home and get my stuff for the sleep over and then I just might say yes to sleep medication. I think they have a TV in the room so that might help to turn on a music channel. I could do some lesson planning etc.

Will be getting a knee injection sometime soon. It's going to be a very busy week ahead!

That's all my hot news. Eating is going well and the exercising is getting back on track.

My students are totally awesome and delightful and I love them already. Oh, they keep my hopping for sure - but that's the great thing about teaching, never a dull moment and always something new to learn. It's the greatest! Kids keep you young, too.

Gotta go work in my room now.

Bye all!

[LauraA]

Hi - you are doing so great, and it is wonderful to keep up with you through your journal. You are quite busy - make me feel lazy! You have done so great with both weight loss and exercise. I find that I do best to not have an exact goal on weight loss - just goals for compliance. That is something that I can control. I made a goal that I wanted to be down 50 pounds by my birthday. At the time that I made it, it meant that I would need to lose 5 pounds per month for two months. Well , the time is drawing near, and I haven't done it! I'm just not setting goals like that again - just goals to stay on plan, and goals to exercise! Good luck with your continued success. take care, LauraA

[Letha.]

Hi Bea,
Are you really down nearly 50 pounds in two months?

7/7/09 429
8/7/09 398
9/7/09 380

That's amazing. I guess all that swimming is paying off. I'm sending you all my best positive vibes for getting the wheelchair you need. Take care.
Letha

[bunsofaluminum]

Bea, keep going!

swimming is so good, and I'm proud of you for that early morning start... getting up early AND THEN working out? You are a hero!

blessings, HeidiW

[f1jim]

Can ya feel them?
Hang in there Bea!!!!!
f1jim