Dissolution's Solution

[nicoles]

Good save with the chocolates! Nice of you to vacuum seal the chicken, that sounds like a disgusting job. (I can't even stand the smell of the butcher area in the supermarket anymore.)

Interesting what she said about the guy needing to go vegan on the show. Well, I guess she gets it, for what it's worth.

How can anyone eat just one snicker out of a whole bag of them? This is unheard of, this magical restraint. They must be geniuses, or wizards, or unicorns, or genius wizard unicorns.

[didi]

While your wife is sick, would she consume a green smoothie with lots of sweet fruit and some kale and/or other leafy greens?

Didi

[bunsofaluminum]

wow I just read through the last few pages...I'm glad the skin thing is clearing up. I bet it was the blanket. They say those aren't good for you. And it's cool that your wife seems to at least understand about eating vegan. Who knows, maybe she'll come around

the strawberries and cocoa powder, carrollynne...wow, fantastic idea!

[Dissolution]

carollynne I keep low fat cocoa powder around, I alternate between using that and cinnamon in my morning oatmeal. Great idea using it on the strawberries.

I think I would rather handle raw chicken, that smell microwaved chicken. She still making chicken rice food for the dogs. it stays int he fridge and gets a short microwave time before feeding to the dogs, to get it up to room temperature. Occasionally I have to prepare it for the dogs, and it smells so bad.

Lesliec1 I've never purposely tried the reverse psychology tactic, but it's clearly how I feel. My wife asked me to talk to her brother about this way of eating. I agreed, but indicated to her that the chances of me getting through his thick genetically-shared-with-her skull were slim to none. She has accused me of having a superior attitude about my diet, and I've never denied it.

There is no such thing as "leftover cake".

I know, right!?

nicoles For me, cheese shops are worse than butcher shops, but neither one are pleasant, that's for sure.

didi Seriously doubtful. She's allergic to apples, dislikes bananas. Seriously, who doesn't like bananas?! Even the fruits she will eat (grapes, melons, canned peaches, cherries, pineapple) she doesn't eat them very often when I have them in the house. She does drink cranberry juice.

Vegetables, she'll eat lettuce and green beans. Lettuce only with blue cheese dressing and green beans only with tons of bacon cooked into them. She eats sweet potatoes, but only on holidays. She will eat winter squashes, but only very occasionally. Carrots when they are cooked with potatoes and pot roast. Potatoes have to have fat with them in some way, friend, mashed with butter and milk, baked with butter and sour cream.

So even if I did make a lettuce, grape, carrot, cherry smoothie, I still doubt I could get her to even try it.

Excellent idea though, for a "normal" person to increase their nutrient intake.

bunsofaluminum The skin thing was a very minor annoyance compared to the way I felt and how bad my back hurt. I'm so happy to be feeling so much better. I have regained my "Super Vegan Powers". I hoping to talk the wife into a joint gym-swim outing this Friday.

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#4 Son was scheduled to move out of the house this month and move in with #1 Son. Looks like that's not going to happen. #4 Son is in the Air National Guard, but works as a contractor. He was told Yesterday that if the sequester happens, his entire department will get a 30 day notice and if it's not resolved by the end of 30 days, they all lose their jobs permanently. Regardless of when it does get resolved.

This is just as #3 finally got a decent job and would be in a position of moving out during this year.

The main thing I was looking forward to with them moving out is it would stop the wife's excuse for some of the junk she brings into the house. I've got a freezer full of stuff that she bought, that they aren't eating, that she doesn't eat either (chicken fries, pot pies, frozen soups, french fries, tater tots). That candy dish it still sitting on the coffee table in the living room, because the "kids" eat it. I should just throw it away, I bet nobody would even notice.

This is funny, #3 went to town the other day and brought back lollipops for everyone. He gave me two of them. I unwrapped one and before I started on it, I looked at the ingredient list. "Buttered Lactic Acid" was listed. I politely informed him that I couldn't have them and gave them back to him. He apologized for trying to poison me.

[janluvs2heel]

"Seriously doubtful. She's allergic to apples, dislikes bananas. Seriously, who doesn't like bananas?!."

Funny, Dissolution, I just told my daughter last night that I am going to stop eating bananas, I just don't like them. They give me heartburn & I have tried using them in my oatmeal, etc, but I just don't like the taste. Plus I have such a hard time keeping them from getting too ripe, which I also do not like. So I am sticking to apples, which are my favorite, oranges here & there & the summer fruits. So you just met someone who does not like bananas.

[Erbse]

"Seriously doubtful. She's allergic to apples, dislikes bananas. Seriously, who doesn't like bananas?!."

Funny, Dissolution, I just told my daughter last night that I am going to stop eating bananas, I just don't like them. They give me heartburn & I have tried using them in my oatmeal, etc, but I just don't like the taste. Plus I have such a hard time keeping them from getting too ripe, which I also do not like. So I am sticking to apples, which are my favorite, oranges here & there & the summer fruits. So you just met someone who does not like bananas.

My older dd doesn't like raw bananas, only in baking.

On another note, Dis, I wonder if you'd be interested in having a look at this website http://www.marriagebuilders.com/. Since it's not about diet, I wonder if your wife would be motivated to read it? It would show her that in order to have a fantastic marriage, one has to fulfill each others most important emotional needs (if we don't have them met, chances are high we will look to get them met somewhere else) and avoid "love busters", e.g. demands, disrespectful judgements, angry outbursts. It's build on the concept that we have a "love bank" and everyone we have contact with deposits or withdraws "love units" from our bank and we deposit or withdraw them from other peoples' "banks". This is how we get to like or don't like people. Once the deposits from a certain person (of the opposite sex) get over a certain threshold, we fall in love. If the deposits go into the negative, we fall out of love. So the bad news is that our spouse can drain our love bank until there is nothing left but the good news is that even at that stage, they can build it up again.

Since stumbling on his site, I have read Dr Harley's book His needs, Her needs and I'm just reading his book Love Busters. My dh is reading the first. The information in the books make perfect sense to us. To me, it's the equivalent of the McDougall programme for marriages

[zippy]

I've never understood people that don't like fruit. I love all of them. I have to ration how much fruit I eat or I could easily overdo it. So hard to limit myself though. Here in the Northeast, the season starts with rhubarb and strawberries in May. For the rest of the summer and into late fall there is a steady progression of cherries, red raspberries, black raspberries, blueberries, currants, gooseberries, apricots, blackberries, peaches, pears, plums, grapes, apples, etc. Then winter rolls around and the stores bring on the pomegranates and citrus fruits. I limit my banana eating to the winter when the local orchards and fields are covered in snow.

As much as I love fruit I get just as excited about the first sweet corn or first ripe tomato. The first taste of any seasonal local produce is a celebration at my house. I feel sorry for people that don't love the taste of just picked fresh food. My mouth waters in anticipation of another great summer of eating!

[AnnaSpanna]

I'm not a big fruit eater.
I've always been a savouries gal. And I crave my veg. I don't crave fruit.
Since doing this WOE I usually have 2 serves of fruit a day and one of them HAS to be banana. It's the only one I genuinely LOVE.
I eat sliced banana and perhaps tinned peaches or frozen berries and tell myself it's dessert.
Works for me.

[Dissolution]

janluvs2heel I have found that I like Chiquita bananas more than Dole bananas. I've had a couple of bad experiences with Dole bananas. I had one batch that looked fine, but tasted bad, and a few times I've gotten them where they almost have a gristle type texture running down the center.

Erbse I'll have to take a closer look that that site and maybe the books. My wife is a firm non-believer in any form of self help book or professional help.

zippy If I thought a fruitarian diet was the best, I would have no problem transitioning over. When the local apples came in last fall I went berserk. I probably ate a dozen a day.

AnnaSpanna I try to keep myself down to two servings of fruit a day.

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Towards the end on January when I started feeling so bad, I started keeping a log of my blood pressure. My BP was running high so I added Hydrochlorothiazide to my daily Lisinopril. Once I got rid of the electric blanket things seemed to go back to "normal". I noticed I needed to take the Lisinopril about every 3 days to keep my BP down, as long as I stayed on the Hydrochlorothiazide.

I know that when I go to the gym on a regular basis, the Lisinopril makes my BP go too low. But even when I do go to the gym regularly, that's not quite enough to keep it down without the Lisinopril. So I decided that I would use the Hydrochlorothiazide and make an effort to reduce sodium in my diet to help control my BP. In addition to starting to go back to the gym on a regular basis.

Yesterday was supposed to be our, go back to the gym day. I am to drop the wife off at the place with the pool, and then I proceed to my gym. I checked my BP yesterday morning and it was high. Then my wife decided she didn't want to start going to the gym on a Friday, that Monday would be a better day to start. So I took a Lisinopril. Then the wife decided it was wrong of her to agree to start Yesterday and then recant. So we went to the gym.

I started on the treadmill and I didn't break any record, but it's been a long time since I've walk/jogged. I had a fair bit of angina, when I finished my 15 minutes of the treadmill I moved to the elliptical, I only pulled a few minutes on that before I decided that I needed to sit down and rest to try and get the angina to go away. I sat for about 10 minutes, and it went away for the most part. I then went to the weight machines. I did 3 exercises and got very light headed. I left the gym and drove back to the pool place. I had the wife drive home. Checked BP when I got home and it was 87/54, which would explain why I was dizzy. But by 11:00 PM I was at 140/89. Doesn't make much sense to me. I've made an appointment with my cardiologist for the 21st.

Last night we had a combined birthday dinner out, 10 of us. One of the things I ordered was skewered vegetables, it was shocking how salty they were.

At Dinner I was sitting next to my sister, everybody was talking about food. #4 mentioned how he had eaten 500 calories of Snickers without even realizing it the night before. I told him Snickers contained the "Holy Trinity" of Sugar, Salt and Fat. My sister then brought of the New York Times article from last weekend http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/24/magazine/the-extraordinary-science-of-junk-food.html?smid=fb-share&_r=0 by Michael Moss.

We stopped by the grocery store on the way home. The wife tried to get me to buy pretzels and canned mandarin oranges for myself. I declined both items, and she got mad. I did buy apples and a nice big bag of fresh oranges. At one point she said: "The healthier you eat, the more it makes me want to eat bad. That's your plan isn't it. You want me to eat myself to death." I assured her I had no such plan. It just seems like she gets mad when she perceives me exercising some form inhuman will power.

Happy Weekend all!

[zippy]

How big is your life insurance policy? Seems like she is trying to kill you.

[Lesliec1]

What a fascinating article! Amazing what's behind every little thing that you barely notice in the grocery store. Not having kids, I never really look at Lunchables and didn't know how much they've changed. I personally am insensed by the astounding amount of yogurt brands and flavors. People really do think they are healthy. And this article says there's more sugar in Yoplait than in Lucky Charms. I consider myself a fierce skeptic but I would not have guessed that. The whole thing is so creepy and evil. I imagine we are only just starting to see the flood of products that pretend to be a tad more healthy. Eat the same garbage with less guilt.

EVERY SINGLE TIME I read your journal I am amazed at how well you can stay off bad foods while being totally immersed in them. I haven't come across anyone here who lives under these circumstances or has quite the strength you have. What the bleep is it about your personality that allows you to do this? Is it rebelliousness? Are you the type to dig your heels in even more when people are "against" you? Just wondering and I wish I had some of that. (I think I'm still in the poor me stage when I'm around other people's food. Maybe some day I'll be stronger...)

It's kind of like you and your wife are the same in a way. She says your stubborn healthy eating is making her eat the opposite. Maybe her stubborn unhealthy eating makes you eat the opposite too.

I don't know anything about BP meds. Is that something you will ever be off or is it not a big issue?

[nicoles]

Zippy, you're funny!

That is a great article. Have you read The End of Overeating? Also great on the same subject.

I'm with Leslie on your ability to eat so well amidst temptation. Crazy impressive.

I've been researching a bunch on ways to manage stress to reduce its harmful effects in health, and so of course, meditation comes up a lot.

I went to a meditation class a while back where the instructor mentioned he had lowered his high BP using meditation alone, no other changes, and apparently science backs him up.

I took this cd out of the library to start out with meditating, and I found it pretty helpful and medically informative, if you feel like trying to augment lowering the blood pressure with some woo-woo mindbody stuff

[carollynne]

Dis, your bp stories were really something. Hope your bp has calmed down. You have just reminded me to take my pill too, I forget today!! I am on the same med. I Love bananas and almost any fruit. But I have to be so judicial and not have too much fruit. Causes me a bit of a upset in the tummy.
Your wife does not like to take much responsibility for her own actions does she? the ole blame game is a crazy one to play in a marriage. We all make our own choices and then you have to live with them too. That is what my mom used to say.
Hope all is a bit better in the family too. Nice you were able to go out and have a dinner together. So cool. My dear husband still get a bit riled up when our #1 sons asks questions and somehow he cannot be happy that I am so much healthier and so slim now, but seems to only care that the waitress has to do her job! always amazing, but there you have it! Keep at the exercising, but sorry you were still experiencing some angina on the treadmill.
Take care of yourself, you owe it to yourself, and that is the bottomline.

[fulenn]

I am so glad you got back to the gym! I have also slacked some in the exercise department, but got going this week. The push-ups have been going well, though.

Sorry about the angina returning. Be careful with yourself!

The electric blanket situation has been interesting to read about. I have one on my bed, but never turn it on because I am not THAT cold. Now I am not sure I will at all. Glad you are improving.

Interesting what your wife said about your plan with healthy eating. I was eating myself to death before I learned about Dr. McDougall and didn't even know it!

Fulenn

[Dissolution]

zippy Haha. I almost wish I had a life insurance policy, then it would make more sense. I'll tell you this though, if you've had two heart attacks and three stint procedures before the age of 43, insurance companies will claim you called them during dinner to try and get off the phone with you. I am essentially uninsurable, life or health.

Lesliec1 If you liked that article, have you seen the video I posted here, last year I think http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7389748n? It's basically about how artificial flavors are engineered to be addictive.

I still get a case of the "poor me" every once in a while. I've never considered myself to be especially stubborn, but I'm also not one to mind going against the establishment. My junior year in high school I wore Hawaiian shirts everyday, even went to an Ozzy Osborune/Motley Crue concert wearing one. Got a couple of Jimmy Buffet comments, but didn't even know who he was at the time. My #2 son quit the Engine 2 diet because he couldn't handle being vegan in social situations.

As a life long obese person I had struggled with food and nutrition my entire life. After watching FoK, reading The China Study, and How to Prevent and Reverse Heart Disease, it was like discovering some hidden truth. Like many of you, at first I just wanted to share my discovery, but after so much disappointment and frustration at other people's reactions, I guess I developed a resolve to stand firm with the new truth I discovered.

As a former smoker I know that moderation is a myth, at least for me it is. I'm also afraid of the slippery slope that will take me back to where I was 18 months ago. That's what happened to #2 son, after he passed his military physical 9 months ago, he abandoned the E2 diet and has regained all of the 30 pounds he had lost. Of course that's the statistical norm for diets. I'm not on a diet, I have a way of life. The wife told me early on that she took the devil's advocate position to "help me", but I'm not so sure I really buy into that.

The problem with the BP medicine is if I stay on it at full strength when I go to the gym, my BP drops too low and I feel bad. I don't mind taking pills, but would prefer if I could eventually drop them entirely.

nicoles I'm not a huge fan of the "woo-woo" stuff, but I think Ornish promoted meditation...maybe not sure. Maybe once I'm down to my ideal weight, am exercising regularly, eating less sodium, if my BP isn't "normal" I'll go for "woo-woo".

carollynne I think it's basically human nature to be somewhat resentful about other people's success, especially if it makes the person feel worse about their own lives/situation/condition.

Also my wife thinks I've "cheated" the system. By not consuming SAD foods, I have not dealt with my food addiction. She would MUCH rather I ate bad food in moderation, than to eat lots of healthy non-calorie dense food.

fulenn I was a little concerned myself on Friday, for a few minutes. Things were better at the gym today.

The electric blanket thing still has me a little tripped out.

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Saturday was my 45th birthday, please guys no birthday wishes, I'll just assume everybody reading this wished me a happy birthday and we'll be done with it and not take up space. The only reason I even mention it is because it's kind of a special event for the wife and I. 21 years ago she surprised me with a trip to Atlantic City for my birthday and we've pretty much been a couple ever since. We still go to A.C. on occasion for my birthday. This year though we have something special planned for her birthday in May, and I didn't want to spend the money on the A.C. trip.

We decided to book a night at a hotel in nearby Frederick, MD. That way we could take a taxi downtown, have a few drinks and not have to worry about driving. I checked the Happy Cow website and noticed two places listed. Cafe Nola and The Orchard. Both looked very accommodating to vegans. I suggested both places to the wife, who doesn't know about Happy Cow and we'll keep it that way. Both menus looked ok to her, but she noticed that the cafe was the ranked 43rd best restaurant in Frederick and The Orchard was ranked 17th. She started trying to figure out what the best ranked restaurant was, I suggested a place called Volt. It's owned by a guy who was runner up on Top Chef one year. She checked and it was ranked 2nd. Then she found the top ranked (granted this is top ranked on the site she was using). It was a place called Ayse Meze, a Greek, Turkish, Lebanese restaurant.

We both checked the menu, it was tapas style and there were lots of vegetable dishes that looked as safe as a restaurant dish can be at times. You know how difficult oil is to avoid and at a mediterranean place, you know the olive oil is going to be flowing. That was the place she pushed for, she says cause she knew I would like it. I think it was because they had duck and lamb on the menu, two of her favorites.

We had a great night out, it was chilly but we walked around downtown for about an hour and then stopped to have a couple of drinks before our reservation time. The food was marvelous, and not nearly as oily as I had expected.

Hummus is one of my favorite foods. I make it at home, without oil or tahini, so I guess I don't really make hummus, but I spice it the same and it works for me. I had a dish called muhammara, it's a spread made with (from their menu) toasted walnuts / roasted bell pepper / hot pepper paste / pomegranate molasses. I HAVE to figure out how to make it at home without the walnuts. I'm thinking maybe undercooked steel cut oats maybe? It was my favorite tapas.

The wife had some rather exotic fare, and she enjoyed hers as well. She even ate some hummus. She brought back one pasta dish she only ate about half of, we later had to trow it away outside because it was making the room stink.

I flossed, brushed and gargled after we go back to the room. We did not achieve intimacy. I woke up in the middle of the night and she was still awake, she mentioned how bad my breath smelled, so I brushed and gargled again. I woke up the next morning, ate oatmeal a bagel and some fruit. Came back to the room, flossed, brushed and gargled again (and yes I brushed my tongue all 3 times).

I decided to try and cuddle with her to wake her up and we still could not achieve intimacy because she said my breath wasn't tolerable. I don't know what to do. It's not like she ate bland food, her one dish easily out smelled anything I ate. Granted her breath smelled like cigarettes, but I can get past it. I'm not sure if she has a sensitivity to something, or she's being mean, or she's subconsciously thinking I smell.

It's very frustrating.

BP this morning wasn't too bad 130/95. Went to the gym, had pretty close to a full workout, getting back into the swing of things after an absence is always tough. After the gym BP was 125/75, much happier with that.

I think this has been a long post, so I'll finish by saying happy Monday.