Dissolution's Solution

[nicoles]

Happy Monday, Dis!

I totally understand about the woo-woo factor. Sort of a last resort, right?

I don't think you have cheated the system, but there might be something to looking into a food addiction if you have one. If you feel it would be to your benefit to do that, of course.


Wow, that muhammara sounds incredible!

Sorry to hear about the difficulty with your wife. She seems to have a lot of really difficult emotions about how you've changed, maybe this instance was another example of that. I know that when I smoked, I could not smell well at all.

[JohnLarson]

I am not sure if this is an option, but is it possible to go to a dentist and see if you have bad breath. I am fairly sure your breath is different. I can not see it being bad after mouthwash. I think hearing it from a neutral third party would be helpful. Maybe there is an issue. Being able to have a professional in there would be good. Hopefully you both could go in to the dentist.

I know your wife is against counseling and I am not even sure if counseling works, but it seems like something needs to change. I can relate to some of the things you two are going through. My wife is not excited about my change in lifestyle. Good example, I get home late last night from being gone the weekend and on the kitchen counter is two big packages of beef jerky. WTF, I have never seen my wife eat beef jerky, the kids do not eat beef jerky, I am the only one in this house that eats beef jerky. I asked my wife about it. "I had a coupon and it sounded good." Then I get, "oh, you can't have any". I am pretty sure my wife loved me just how I was and is a little afraid of the new me and is having a hard time with it. I trust the fact that she loves me and hope she is just having trouble coping with change.

Hang in there.

[Erbse]

zippy
Also my wife thinks I've "cheated" the system. By not consuming SAD foods, I have not dealt with my food addiction. She would MUCH rather I ate bad food in moderation, than to eat lots of healthy non-calorie dense food.

I decided to try and cuddle with her to wake her up and we still could not achieve intimacy because she said my breath wasn't tolerable. I don't know what to do. It's not like she ate bland food, her one dish easily out smelled anything I ate. Granted her breath smelled like cigarettes, but I can get past it. I'm not sure if she has a sensitivity to something, or she's being mean, or she's subconsciously thinking I smell.

Hi Dis,
re cheating the system: just because you are eating larger amounts of low calorie foods now doesn't mean you always will. I have finally beaten the urges to need large volume by applying You are not your brain by J. Schwartz. I eat normal amounts of food now. So if one day you end up eating less volume, her argument will be invalid.

Re her claim of your bad breath: I remember you saying you like fasting for a day? Why not test out her claim and fast for a day and then try intimacy? With nothing in your stomach, no way of smelling of a particular food. If she's still claiming there is bad breath, just eat a little of something both you and her approve of to "flavour" your breath .

The irrational stuff your wife says reminds me of what I read in Dr David Burns's books. Many people believe the irrational thoughts that pop into their heads. He works with people to make them aware of the most common forms of twisted thinking, e.g all-or-nothing thinking, overgeneralization, mental filters, discounting the positive, jumping to conclusions, magnification, emotional reasoning, "should" statements, labeling, personalization and blame. I got the list out of his book The Feeling Good Handbook. Even though your wife won't read any books like this, you might find it helpful to gain insight into how her thinking works. It's been years since I read it but I found it very helpful at the time.

Erbse

[LoriLynn]

It's reassuring to see you active again in your journal. I am also making a stronger effort these days. I really want to get those last 50 pounds off.

Before this WOE, my husband and the worst breath ever! I used to slip him breath mints and chewing gum and remind him to brush extra, particularly if he had meetings with clients. He used lots of mouthwash. I just figured it was a normal part of aging, although when I got particularly offended I would ask him if he had a rotten tooth or something.

After we watched FOK in June of 2011, we both changed our diets immediately and his bad breath went away. I was so happy about this. I think it's my favorite by product of this WOE, although he might be more thrilled that his arrhythmia stopped.

My point is, I doubt your breath smells worse, although she may smell some veggies after meals that she doesn't care for. I think it's just another way for her to get back at you for changing. Hopefully, someday, she will stop resenting it and see the positive side.

My husband has eased up on his healthy eating these days and buys a lot more junk food items, especially for the kids. It drives me nuts to find bags of vegan cookies, chips and graham crackers in the cupboards when I am trying to regain my control. Yesterday, I found one such bag and I tossed it into the trash can. If he says anything, I am going to tell him I ate them. I know he wants me to be successful and hopefully the next time he buys junk, he needs to hide it better.

Maybe if your wife leaves too much candy or cookies laying around, it should "disappear". You can tell her you ate it.

[SunshineDay]

Sorry, I really can't believe your breath would be that offensive, especially after brushing/flossing/mouth wash, etc etc. No, sadly I do think it may just be an attempt to exert 'control' over you and the marriage, mean-spirited though it may be.....

[carollynne]

I agree with Sunshine. What a nice day you had otherwise. hope it gets better with the wife... oneday!

[Lesliec1]

Oh, cool, I remember that 60 minutes piece on the flavorists. So fascinating, so horrible, so everything. I remember I had a college friend who's father was big in the scent industry - but it was scents as it pertains to the fast food industry.

As a former smoker myself, I loved your comment about people like us getting the myth of moderation. Haha, imagine if you tried to only smoke on Sunday mornings or just do one pack per week or per month. Or maybe I should suggest to my recovering alcoholic neighbor that he should try just one drink every 3 days. (Not to say that I don't slip up a lot, but I know aiming for moderation would be such a huge mistake that it's almost comical.)

Did your son end up losing his job? What a big stressor for everyone.

Oh and about the breath thing. That would drive me crazy not knowing if it was me or not! Do you have trusted friends or family who would be brutally honest about that? Meaning, get a second opinion and say "you need to tell me 100% TRUTHFULLY, how is my breath? I won't be insulted-- just need to know." But then even with family they may not want to tell you either way...

[Dissolution]

nicoles I don't know about the food addiction thing. After listening to Doug Lisle, and understanding more about how much processed food is tweaked to make it hyper palatable, maybe I'm just normal.

Do I have a hard time resisting chocolate and candy when it's sitting in front of me? Yeah, but how many people wouldn't have that problem.

I think the wife's idea that I have cheated the system comes from what my meals sometimes look like. For instance 600 calories of Rice-tomatoes-peppers-mushrooms-broccoli is a LOT or food. Sure, I used to eat that same volume of food of say hamburger helper, of course it was probably 1200 calories or more.

JohnLarson That was a pretty harsh move with the beef jerky. I'd have been pissed.

I have an appointment with my dentist coming up next month, I'll have to ask him. I still fairly sure it's in her head. Pre-McDougall, I always enjoyed split pea soup, and my wife hated it. I was making split pea soup the other day, she passed through the kitchen and then started gagging and went and threw up because of the smell. She never had a reaction like that before.

Erbse I added both of those books to my amazon wishlist for future purchase. Thanks for the recommendation.

I had not fasted in a while, probably close to a year. Spur of the moment yesterday I decided to fast for the day. Other than feeling a little light-headed at bowling, it went well.

LoriLynn I remember what my breath was like on Atkins, oh it was horrible I could barely stand it myself.

She hates most of the foods I eat, and I think she is just mentally transferring her hatred of those foods to my breath.

I did polish off an entire box of graham crackers a couple of months ago, luckily my wife hasn't noticed they are gone and hasn't replaced them yet.

If I told my wife about the graham crackers, she would make sure she always had some on hand. If I told her I ate some of her butter and fat-laden candies, I'm not sure what would happen. Either she would reverse guilt trip on me (blame me for making her feel bad about me going off my "diet") or she would start pushing more bad food onto me.

SunshineDay I think you are right. Sometimes it makes me wish there was a "What If" button, so that I could show her what would happen to me if I switched back to eating SAD.

carollynne I really did enjoy that restaurant.

Lesliec1 I do have a friend, that once a year he goes on a hunting trip for a week, in a cabin, in the woods with some other guys. He smokes several packs of cigarettes during that week, and never smokes any other time. I find that very impressive.

#4 son did not lose his job, so that was a relief.

I guess I should ask my Mom about my breath, next time I see her.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I went to the gym Monday and Wednesday last week. and so far Monday this week and am planning on going later this morning.

Last Thursday - Saturday I felt sick again, like I had another cold.

Sunday I went golfing. Rode instead of walked because #3 and #4 sons were hungover.

#4's GF is back in the hospital with her Ulcerative Colitis. Her grandmother bought her Dr. Fuhrman's "Eat to Live", which she hasn't tried doing. Mostly I think because she doesn't know how to cook, and doesn't seem to be motivated to learn.

A couple of things popped up on my Facebook feed from Dr. Greger a few weeks ago concerning UC and I sent those to her. After her last bout they put her on Humira, and I think she was hoping that it would "cure" her. I just find it amazing that none of her doctors think that her digestive tract problem has ANYTHING to do with what she eats.

Well, I got kicked out of the pantry. Twice last week the wife couldn't find a canned good she wanted and now I have to keep my canned goods separated from hers. FYI the first item she couldn't find was cream of celery soup, why I got blamed for that I don't know. I can honestly say I have NEVER opened a can of that. The second was kidney beans, which is less likely to be my fault that you would think. I tend to cook dehydrated beans and then keep them in the freezer, but I guess I could have eaten a ...oh I know. When we had the New Years food contest, I used two cans in my read beans and rice. So I have my own space now.

I think if I would stop getting sick my weight would drop. I have a terrible habit of binge eating when I am sick.

One of the things I've always thought that gave Dr. McDougall credibility over most other "non-mainstream" "alternative" doctors is his avoidance of trumpeting any "magic" supplement or super food. So I'm always suspicious when I see things like this Dr. Greger video about Fenugreek. http://youtu.be/KAvNZlSyBe8 Here's the study it references. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2978122/pdf/1550-2783-7-34.pdf

I must say I'm tempted to try it. Especially after #2 son'a experience last year with Beet Juice Doping http://nutritionfacts.org/video/doping-with-beet-juice/ For those of you that don't remember he was able to cut a full minute off his military PT test run of 1.5 miles, by eating a can of beets and drinking the juice an hour before trying.

Also, if you remember he went on the Engine 2 diet last year because he failed his run. He went vegan and lost 30 pounds. He went back to SAD right after passing his PT test and is currently 25 pounds up where he was when he passed last year. He has to test again on Friday. He's not worried. My money is on him failing, but he is planning on doing the beets again. We'll see.

Happy Wednesday all.

[fulenn]

Funny about the pantry! I never did like cream of celery soup, in fact, I can't even remember what my Mom used it for, but she always had a can of it on the shelf.

Sorry about #2 son. If he fails, maybe he will try eating well again. I can't imagine that the beet juice is the only reason he did well last year, but I guess we'll see.

Have a good week!

Fulenn

[bbq]

I just listened to this interview with Caldwell Esselstyn and did some research on nitric oxide

http://traffic.libsyn.com/extremehealthradio/ep-57-caldwell-esselstyn-1-10-2013.mp3

Looks like root vegetables such as beet and radish are able to promote nitric oxide production

http://pubs.acs.org/doi/abs/10.1021/jf60199a016

Unique Combination of Beetroot and Hawthorn Berry Promotes Nitric Oxide Production and Reduces Triglycerides in Humans

http://connection.ebscohost.com/c/articles/78558860/unique-combination-beetroot-hawthorn-berry-promotes-nitric-oxide-production-reduces-triglycerides-humans

I found that even the bark of French maritime pine trees could be beneficial

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19145776

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21436602

Plant foods such as oats and sesame seeds are also high in the amino acid L-arginine - a precursor of nitric oxide

http://www.livestrong.com/article/275892-foods-high-in-l-arginine/

http://nutritiondata.self.com/foods-000089000000000000000.html

[carollynne]

Hi Dis, how all is well in your house. I think it is a marvelous idea to have your own shelf space, thereby avoiding all conflict, but I wonder what will pop up next instead.
Hope all is well. thanks for all those links that were posted too.

[Dissolution]

Confession time *I know it's April 1st, but this is not April Fools.

I've been getting a little frustrated lately. I seem to have a problem with breaking through the obesity barrier for long. I can get down to 207-208 and then I either binge or the weight just goes back up.

I my mind, I'm typically eating 1500-1800 calories a day. So I decided it was time to try something else.

My wife is out of town for 3 weeks, so I figured it would be a good time to try something new without listening to any of her opinions or judgement.

I decided to try low carb, (just for the weight loss). Except, I would attempt vegan low carb. I bought some fake meat and went to task.

First I would like to state that keeping under 20 carbs is very difficult, if you are not eating real meat, and trying to stay relatively low fat.

So after 2 days of 20-30 carbs on my vegan atkins plan, I felt like ass. I hate fake meat, probably a little less than I would hate real meat. Why are hot dogs so popular? They're disgusting, the fake ones I had, tasted just like I remembered real hot dogs tasting.

So what to do. Well the first thing I am going to do is count calories. I've proven that at the least I can maintain weight loss eating this way without really worrying about calories.

The second thing is to try MWL. The modifications I'll need to make are:

Eliminate All Flour Products
I think flour can be a trigger for me. So this one will be a sacrifice, but it should be worthwhile.

Make Green & Yellow Vegetables One-Half to One-Third of your meal
I eat a lot of green, but it never hurts to increase it.

Eat Uncooked Foods
I must admit, I probably eat fewer salads than any other vegan on the planet.

Restrict Fresh Fruit to No More Than Two Servings a Day
This one will be tough.

Restrict variety
I guess the best thing here would be to create a couple of different meals and just keep eating those. I'm going to have to think about this one. Would probably be best to make a large batch and split it up into single portions so I don't have to think about it.

I've been using "My Fitness Pal" to track calories, mostly because it has the capability to scan barcodes for calorie lookup. I do use canned vegetables.

Thursday
Food: 1878
Exercise: 0
Net:1878

Friday
Food: 1220
Exercise: 365
Net: 855

Saturday
Food: 1762
Exercise: 1661
Net: 101

Sunday
Food: 1391
Exercise: 434
Net: 957

I know those numbers are a little low. Should I be shooting for 1800 calories gross or net?

Anyways, happy Monday all.

[carollynne]

Greetings, Good luck, and I know you can do this! It may be the best time to really try something new like MWL, and I agree the flour products are the worst for me too!
You know everyone always says that the last 10- 20 lbs are the worst to lose.

[wildgoose]

Dis, I totally agree with you on the Frankenfood! Completely disgusting. Well, it's an experiment, and now you know the results. No such thing as bad information. (But your timing was good -- probably best that your wife is gone for a few weeks .)

Flour will pile on the weight for me every time. Even the healthy whole grains. Even whole grain pasta. Potatoes and sweet potatoes seem to keep me fuller without overeating.

I'm not a big salad eater either, but I do keep a big Tupperware bowl of raw veggies in the fridge. Good for snacking or at a meal.

I'm not quite as strict on fruit as I probably should be, but what I do seems to work OK for me. I have blueberries (1/2 c) in my oatmeal every morning. A banana or a couple of Cuties after dinner. And at the end of the day, one homemade oatmeal square (a recipe I got off one of the forums -- made with ripe bananas, frozen cherries, rolled oats, vanilla, ginger, cinnamon, and cloves -- no sugar, no flour -- in an 8x8 pan, cut into 16ths). It's my signal to myself that I'm through eating.

When I was tracking calories vs exercise, I used the gross number as my target, but I'm kinda OCD about stuff like that (which is why I quit tracking, but that's me -- YMMV).

Good luck, Dis, and let us know what you figure out!

Goose

[Dissolution]

carollynne Things have been pretty smooth with the wife gone. I've thrown away lots of her "just sitting around" candy. She's extended her stay another week, so I have some more hassle free time to work on this.

wildgoose I'll have to look up that oatmeal square recipe. I like the idea of having that signal that you're done eating for the day.

MWL and calorie counting are going pretty well. I still eat a bit too much fruit, and I haven't made any real attempts to restrict variety.
I have cut starches back, in order to keep calories down and volume up. I think I may start including more sweet potato. Orange food seems to agree with me.

#2 son is really pushing this idea of us walking all of our golf courses this year. It's tough. His smart phone app is showing us burning close to 2000 calories for 18 holes. Mine only tracks walking, not accounting for club swings and pulling a 20-30 pound cart, so I'm showing 1100 for walking 4.5-5.5 miles with 500 feet of elevation gain.

Still having some blood pressure problems. Last Saturday I took my BP meds the night before and my BP dropped so low when we stopped to hit, that I thought I was going to pass out. Last night I didn't take any BP meds and the light headed feeling was not as severe today, but still present.

The bad news is I really miss my kale sandwich wraps. The good news is I really like cooked kale. The lack of flour has been good I think.

Weight has been bouncing around a bit, will keep this up for another week to get a feel for how well it's working.

Monday
Food: 1399
Exercise: 0
Net: 1399

Tuesday
Food: 1663
Exercise: 0
Net: 1663

Wednesday
Food: 1747
Exercise: 455
Net: 1292

Thursday
Food: 1363
Exercise: 0
Net: 1363