Dr. McDougall's Online Discussion Board

Dissolution, Hello!! I just wanted to jump on your journal again, and tell you to have a great week. Your enthusiasm is just so wonderful. Your success is really nice to read about and see your pictures. Your wive will no doubt get to the point of some of those awful things with diabetes like the amputations, and some people are just that stubborn that, oh no, it will not happen to me, etc. Total denial we are seeing here I know several of them here in my town, and their moms have had the surgery to remove some part of their lower extremities and still all they make for their families is fried chicken, fried ham, and mac and cheese!! I continually hear about the mac and cheese, and not the box variety, the kind with real cheddar cheese, in the oven, with bread crumbs, and more butter on top! Now you figure that one for me! I mean talk about complete denial! So I was thinking of your dear wife, not able to at least get up and walk now, and perhaps her circulation is even further inhibited, and I am truly praying for her. I think you are in a state of marriage that can be described as tough love. Nothing you can do for her at all. It will take a miracle.

I sure hope this does not sound too preachy or negative to you, or anyone else!
And have a great day out there, and enjoy your life!! leave her to hers!

Of course, maybe she has found your Journal & that is why she is jealous. My gosh, look at all the women in your Journal commenting on what you should do, especially those posting 3-4 x's a day. My goodness!!!




(Of course I am kidding)

AlwaysAgnes Thanks for the links. I bet my problem is poor posture. My belly probably used to stop me from slouching forward, now that it is diminishing, I bet I am slouching more. I still have my gall bladder, and have never had any trouble out of it....that I know of.

nicoles You can smell when he has had dairy, coffee or sugar? He is understandably freaked out, let us all hope that you use your Super Vegan Powers for good over evil.

Katydid Thanks for that great information. I think I can use that to plan out a strategy. First though I will need to set an objective. Hmmm...

Adrienne My wife believes that jealousy is a sign of love. My lack of jealousy she attributed to anything from arrogance to apathy. Because I love her, I want her to be happy, not possess her. So if it would make her happier to be with someone else or away from me, then so be it.

MixedGrains LOl, thanks for the laugh. Of course she has eaten and enjoyed foie gras, so it might be suitable.

Debbie My wife and my mother went to battle a couple of times early in our marriage. I think I made it perfectly clear to both of them, that I would pick my wife's side over my mother's. I once didn't speak to my mother for six months. They will now, on occasion spend time together without me even being there. My wife used to get jealous that we lived 30 minutes from my mother, and 22 hours from hers. Now my mother is alive and hers isn't.

carollynne So sorry to hear about how your Uncle died. Sounds like he did make a positive final impression.

If you stick with the main stream though, there's nothing really wrong with mac'n'cheese for diabetics. Sugar causes diabetes, EVERYBODY knows that, silly.

janluvs2heel Trust me, if she found my journal, I would know. It would be like one of those movies, where the guy walks through the door, and the knife flies through the air and sticks into the wall right next to his head.

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The wife and I rarely eat at the same time anymore, and I also don't normally eat in the same room as her. Last I did. I started with a Japanese sweet potato that I had sliced, partially boiled and then broiled in the oven with a little brown sugar and cinnamon on top. Then I had steamed broccoli and red cabbage, with some nutritional yeast on top. Then I ate a stew with broccoli stalk, red cabbage, black beans, potato, red pepper, leeks. It was a pretty large bowl, the wife commented, "You eat more food than anybody I have ever seen.". I said, "I know, awesome isn't it?." She would be horrified if I told her she was consuming twice the calories I was. Maybe I should, I don't think it would have the desired effect though.

I've been thinking about the information that Katydid posted. I think it's a technique I could use. First though I need to set an objective. One simple to complete, yet effective task. Watch Forks Over Knives? The Starch Solution? Barnard's Reversing Diabetes video? Maybe something tougher like, giving up half'n'half or eating McDougall for a week?

The wife made some comment to me at the Japanese restaurant about not wanting me to give us bad karma (something was missing from our bill, and I didn't notice) I told her, "Don't get me started on karma." She said. "why?", I said, "Because nothing had to suffer and die for my dinner." Her reply was,"Plants. You killed plants, it's the same thing." I just shook my head and said,"You REALLY think that?"

#3 and #4 and #4GF came in last night with a bunch of bags from the grocery store. They had decided to make home made chicken fajita's. #4 then proceeded to demonstrate, "How to get food poisoning". There were raw chicken parts and pieces and juice all over the place! I think I would have been upset with the preparation, even before my vegan days.

I just had to go get some cold medicine for the wife. She has a full blow chest cold now. She asked, "Why is this stuff always happening to ME now?" There was a pause, then she said, "If you say what you are thinking out loud, I'll have to kill you." How did she know? lol

After a week long vacation and another week, getting back on track, weight-loss has recommenced. Down a pound this morning.

Wow, your dinner sounds so yummy. I have a hard time understanding why your wife won't try your food.

I have to agree, your food sounds really yummy.

Where do you find all of the time to cook?? I spent a good part of my Sunday making chili, babaganoush and sauted spinach, tomotoes, red peppers and zuchini. Delish!

Hey I really liked the comment about all the women on the thread , and thought, all of the mommi types!! I have thought the same thing myself.... what a hoot, He is a big boy and has in fact demonstrated that can fix it himself..... Good luck!

Hi again Dissolution. Yes, I did read the history in the beginning of your journal - how amazing. I'm really following your journal and your wonderful progress. I actually feel bad for your wife, but also bad for you having to deal with it. It seems that if she continues to see you do well, maybe she'll at least reach a point of understanding. After all, you have already saved your life! Take care, LauraA

What a fantastic journal! I've read every page with intense interest. I applaude your attitude and resolve to save your life! Just had to let you know what an interesting read yours is!
You're inspiring!

toadfood I think her dislike of anything I eat, is just all in her head.

VegSexy I do most of my cooking in my rice cooker/vegetable steamer. I put two or three cups of water into the ricer cooker, added the chopped vegetable stalk, peeled and chopped one potato, then the pepper(pre-chopped), leeks (pre-chopped) and beans are stuff I keep in the freezer. Then spices of course, didn't spend much time on it at all.

carollynne I would be curious to know that the male/female ratio is, on these forums. I'm very sure the ratio of females to males is much higher in the journal section. I'm quite sure I would get far fewer comments in my journal if I didn't have such a difficult time with my wife.

LauraA You would think that after witness the benefits I have achieved, first hand, she would want to be on-board with this plan 100%. Her reluctance makes little sense to me.

Lonia Jane Thank you for your kind words.
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Monday

Went to chiropractor, had this conversation.

Chiro: Wow, you've lost a lot of weight. How are you doing it.
Me: It's kind of low fat vegan.
Chiro: Better make sure you're getting enough protein.
Me: Well, if you think about it, elephants, giraffes, rhinos, buffalo's, they only eat plants. So plants have all the protein you'll ever need.
Chiro: Some people have a hard time getting enough protein.
Me: No. No they don't.
Chiro: ....

Back feels better. I was out and about earlier than normal. Decided to check out a vegetarian restaurant that my DiL told me about. Now I understand that vegetarian (the commonly accepted definition) and vegan are different, but I would expect to have a better chance of ordering something unmodified from a vegetarian restaurant, than a normal SAD restaurant. Silly me.

I was expecting tofu, tempeh, seitan, or maybe some bean curd dishes. Nope, everything was cheese and egg based. They even had things labeled vegan that contained egg and cheese. I left and went to Ruby Tuesdays.

At Ruby Tuesdays I had this conversation.

Waitress: Is everything alright?
Me: No, I ordered the zucchini to be prepared without oil. This appears to have lots of oil on it.
Waitress: Oh no sire, there is no oil on that.
Me: Can you see how shiny and greasy it is?
Waitress: The cooks assured me that was butter.
Me: ....I'm vegan
Waitress: Oh. Let me get you a new order of that.

I relayed my restaurant experiences to my wife last night. She thinks I'm crazy. She though I was being unreasonable to expect a vegetarian restaurant to also carry vegan dishes. She also felt that me even ordering the zucchini without oil proves that I have an unhealthy obsession about my "diet". Because a little bit of oil isn't going to hurt me.

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Tuesday

Down 2 more, to 227.

I June, #2 and #3 and a few guys from our bowling team/league are going on a weekend trip to the Virginia state bowling tournament. There will be golf. I do not know how to play golf. I have decided to at least learn how to hit a golf ball without being too embarrassing. I have an old set of my father's clubs in the attic. I found a Medicus Golf Swing Trainer club on craigslist for sale for $10. When I explained to my wife that I was leaving a little early to meet this guy, to buy the club she freaked out. She told me I was not allowed to start playing golf. The club wound up being for a left-hander, so I didn't get it. I can't wait for the mountain bike conversation...

Today was fasting day.

Dis, I think golfing is a great way to get exercise in, and enjoy the male bonding of the easy on the bod sport. Most of the men in my family play or played golf. Good for you! Is she up and around yet? After the health scares you have had, it was time for some big time change, Ask her if she wants you to die?
the males who respond to my journal, sometimes put it in a private note. that is ok, too, we are all on this journey together, and since we are a minority, the ones who are trying to get healthy and succeeding at it, hurray for us.

Your journal is different from the others because it actually has a *plot* -- what will Dis's wife say or do next? Will she finally see the light? You have done a good job of setting up the situation and creating characters.

Ever consider writing screenplays?

carollynne The wife is walking on her ankle some. I think it's healing fine. I did take the wheelchair when we went out Saturday night. She wants me to get the wheelchair out of the house because it depresses her.

Broadbean LOL...I never considered this to have a plot. I guess there's a bit of drama going on in my life. I'm glad it's interesting to read. It has helped me a great deal, to understand where some of her feelings are coming from, but more importantly the responses have assured me that in general I'm making the right choices with my health and my relationship.

Screenplay? haha...I was thinking more along the lines of a diet book. The Diet of Fail: How one woman ignored the best solution to obesity and diabetes on the planet. Just kidding or course....

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Wednesday weigh-in: 224....Holy hell?!?! The 220's sure seem to be dropping off fast. Guess we'll see what tomorrow brings.

So glad to hear that the wife is at least feeling something about the sight of a wheel chair! just think of it as she is amputated or something else.... She is just too young to be facing all of this alone, adn wish her own attitude did not work against her so much.
So COOl!1
congrats on the wt drop!! Best feeling in the world isn't it? Nothing ever tastes as good as this feeling feels, !! woo-who!!
Take care of yourself, as no one else ever does!

I wonder what will happen when you tell her you weigh less than she does?

It's true, your journal does have a fair amount of drama, and your fan club comes out in force when we feel you've been wronged. I've had to bite my tongue (fingers?) in the past to keep from crying foul at what your wife has done since I know I can't have the full picture from a blog post.

So that leads me to ask: what do you love about your wife? From what we get here, we have a picture of her as a stubborn, hyper-defensive, and sometimes emotionally abusive woman who would cut off her nose to spite her face (i.e. keep eating like crap even though it makes her feel horrible). What are the positives? It's true that you can't save her - and good for you to recognize that - but you obviously care. I hope I'm not stepping out of line here, but I'm honestly curious.

On a different note, congrats on the continued and impressive results. I second nomikins's question, too: shall we expect a mushroom cloud from the east coast when you weigh less than she does?